Stink Bugs

This may seem like an absurd starting point, but stink bugs are on my mind and have been for several days, which does little to make my mind seem appealing. The brown marmorated stink bug has made its presence known in my garden, and if I did not have a friend in Maryland, where the stink bug invasion has reached epic proportions, then I might not have reacted so strongly, my worry cycle quickly shifting to warp speed at the thought of these bugs in my home in uncontrollable amounts, darting around everywhere I look.

First, I saw wee little babies on my blackberries in the back corner, where I also spied their cousins, the leaf-footed bugs.

I started researching how to keep leaf-footed bugs at bay, because I did not want them on my blueberries or tomatoes. That’s when I discovered my mistake, how I was the one at fault for any problems I would have with these insects.

It’s all my fault!

Because I wanted the blackberries to grow undisturbed, I let some of the area get weedy. And where do stink bugs and their cousins like to overwinter? In weedy areas. Where is the only place I saw them (at first)? Right in the weeds by the blackberries.

Oh, my stupid. It hurts.

Now, a few days ago, I noticed stink bugs on the tomatoes. And then, yesterday, when I was checking on my peppers, there they were, too. So mad. I was so mad.

I tried diatomaceous earth, dusting the plants in clouds of it. But that was foolhardy. DE works best for people who have issues with slugs or nematodes, soft-bodied creatures that can be hurt by the DE. It has no effect on insects with firm exoskeletons, and stink bugs, when they first started showing up in Pennsylvania after stowing away on Asian imports, come readily equipped with their own suits of armor.

I researched some strategies online for dealing with the bugs. I kept coming across ideas that mentioned dish soap, either getting the bugs into buckets of the stuff to drown or spraying them until they suffocate.

Today I bought a spray bottle.

This evening, like a matronly ninja, I went to the backyard, to the tomatoes and peppers, and The Great Stink Bug Massacre of 2013 began. I had to refill the spray bottle three times, but in the end, I discovered that (A) I had more stink bugs in my garden than I’d initially thought but thankfully, (B) the technique really worked. Gorgeous carcasses littering the base of my plants. Bonus: Some of the produce has now been thoroughly pre-washed. Bonus, Part Deux: I nearly stepped on a king snake walking back to the house and screamed so loud that he shot across the yard, though apparently not loud enough to draw my kids outside to check on me. I have learned, then, that dish soap is effective against stink bugs and that I should also avoid loudly dying in the backyard, if possible, as no one will attempt to save me.